To: Samhita Mukhopadhyay, Mayor of Feminist Village, NY

Recognize Beyoncé as our Lord and Savior

Beyoncé is an unstoppable heroine and infallible deity, and she stall stand as our magnificent feminist overlord.

She is our Messiah, and she, indeed, runs the world.

You shall bow before Her Flawlessness and pay your respects in the form of trinkets and toys for Miss Blue Ivy Carter.

Why is this important?

People should be concerned about this issue because haters are gonna hate.

We must combat the haters.

In the words of Mary J. Blige, we do NOT need any further hateration or holleration in this dancery.